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Restless, after eating dinner Lila decided a walk would be helpful. She knew it was too late to walk along the beach, but up Collins Avenue might not be bad. There were many clubs and hotels with a lot of activity. Remembering that this was South Florida and summer, she didn’t need a jacket. So she grabbed her small purse, her door key and headed to the elevator. Then she took the stairs instead. Coming around to the lobby area, Lila spotted the friend of the golden man. He sat and watched the front door and the elevator. Is he looking for me? Why is he here?

Lila turned and headed back up the stairs to her room. In her room, she paced. Once again the anxiousness of why was she there. Lila had a dream, and it prompted her to return to a place she hadn’t lived in over 30 years. The pieces of the dream had faded, and now she did not understand why she was there. Then there was the guy, the golden guy, and his nosy friend. How did they figure in her being there?

Breathe in, breathe out. The exercise she had learned over the years to calm herself. Lila sat and did freewriting. Everything that came to her, no matter what it was she wrote. At some point, she hoped it would all make sense.

Writing Lila’s dream unfolded. There were plenty of people and lots of music and a voice that said come home. She remembered sand, sand in everything and everywhere. There was a tower and a small bridge. Then there were cranes. The name Karen appeared. She knew no one by that name. Her high school emerged. Not there were the words Lila heard. Was she in the right place, or did come home refer to someplace else? She had lived in many places over the past 30 years.

Oh no! The beach house was in my dream. Why had she not known that the night before? But in the dream, she was the only person at the beach house. Heart, your heart, Lila heard. Her hand shook. What was it about her heart? Her mind went blank. She had spent so much time trying to get out of Miami, now she was back, she was more than ready to leave but knew she couldn’t.

The golden man’s friend was eerie. She didn’t believe in coincidences. Time to pull on my big girl pants and face whatever is coming my way once again.

© 2019, Ivy Jade

Jacob took his dinner onto the patio. He didn’t want to miss her if she walked along the beach that afternoon. It was quiet along that stretch of the beach. He allowed his mind to wander as he ate his dinner.

His house phone ringing interrupted his dinner. Why is Carla calling me? Jacob spoke with his daughter on the weekends and never during the week.

“Dad, I had a dream about you last night.”

“Was it a bad dream?”

“No, I do not think so. This morning all I could remember that it was about you. Are you okay?”

“Carla, I am fine. If you can not remember the dream, what made you call?”

“There was something about the dream, but I can not put my finger on what is troubling me. So I had to hear your voice. Sorry I did not mean to upset you.”

“Honey, I am not upset. I am trying to understand why the dream bothered you.”

“Dad, is there someone new in your Life?”

Jacob thought of the woman on the beach the night. But he couldn’t say she was in his life. He laughed. “Do you have someone in mind for me?”

“Funny Dad, oh I remember you were walking away with a woman, and you never looked back.”

“Honey, I am not sure what the dream was telling you. But I would never walk away from you. You are stuck with me for all of your life.”

Carla laughed, “Now you make me sound silly.”

“That was not my intent. Dreams usually point to something or someone. I do not believe in coincidences, I saw a woman on the beach night before last, and it continues to feel as if I know her. Was the woman in your dream black?”

“I could only see the shape of the woman. Nothing else. Dad, are you interested in knowing the black woman? Do you like black women?”

“I do not know the woman I saw on the beach.” Jacob refused to answer Carla’s second question. A quick goodbye and a cold dinner. Jacob sat with the phone still in his hand.

Why am I interested in this woman? That was the question Paul had asked earlier. Jacob sat staring into the ocean. Dusk had taken over, and there were few people on the beach.

Is Carla’s dream and the woman on the beach connected?

A tap on his door brought Jacob out of his musings. Paul stood at the door. Jacob opened the door and laughed. “So you happened to be out this time of night?”

“No, I wanted to talk with you about what is going on with you.”

“Not sure what you mean.”

“Really! I asked you about that woman, and you pretended to not know what I was talking about. Then you tell Carla about her, but not me.”

“Wait, you spoke with my daughter.”

“Yes, Carla called me after she spoke with you. She is concerned about you. She thought I would know if there was someone in your life.”

Jacob stared at Paul. “I think you need to go home and get rest. You and I have been friends since elementary school, but you don’t know everything about me and I don’t know everything about you. Right now you sound like a jealous lover.”

“I can’t believe you would say that to me. I’m not gay.”

“Well, listen to yourself. You are upset about a woman I have only seen once. You have seen her twice. What is that about? Have you always only wanted me to be with you? From the first day, you had problems with Shawn. Now I think about it you were in the middle of most of our problems over the twenty years we were together. Did you jump for joy when she died?”

“How can you say these things?”

“I’m trying to make sense of your behavior. I think you need to leave.”

“I’ll leave, but I will sort this out.”

“There is no this.”

“Oh yes, there is, and that woman is at the center.”

Long after Paul had left, Jacob wondered why he had not told Paul why he stared at the mystery woman. I have kept nothing from Paul, why now?

Jacob put the yearbooks in the box. It was time to let it go, but he knew it would always bug him. Who was she and why did she seem familiar?

Digging into the past would leave Jacob with a bad taste in his mouth. His ex-wife now there was an awful memory. Thank you, Paul, for that reminder.

The woman on the beach continued to haunt Jacob. Where he knew her from was on the tip of his tongue. She had to be someone in his past. He didn’t believe in fortune tellers, but going to one now seemed like it might help. Only if he could get a good nights sleep. This woman had kept him up most of the night. Wondering about her was like a toothache that would not go away until he did something for the ache.

After dinner, he would tackle the yearbooks. Then if he didn’t see the woman from the beach, he would let it go. Well, unless she appeared on the beach again. Then he would have to approach her and ask her name. Maybe her name would make him know how he knew her. Deep down, he knew something connected them. What was the connection that was keeping him up? How could I explain to Paul my behavior when I couldn’t explain it to myself?

*****

Something about school made Lila think of the golden man, as she referred to him. She attended a segregated high school and her first college. She knew the connection was in Miami. Am I here for him?

Lila continued to drive through Miami. She was on a mission but had no clue what it was about. When she jumped on the plane, she promised herself she would be open to whatever came her way. She knew the camera which was an extension of her would impede the whatever.

Daylight faded as streaks of purple filled the evening sky. Still puzzled of the quest, she drove back to the hotel. Her stomach reminded her she had not eaten in hours. Not wanting to deal with crowds in the packed restaurant, Lila went to her room to order room service. Twice she almost called down to cancel the order. There was the restlessness from before.

Why am I here? What did the dream mean? Maybe I have spoken with someone of I left home. The impulsive nature of her trip seemed silly. Lila was methodical about everything in her life. So why did she up and leave without even telling anyone where she was going?

The knock on the door brought her out of revelry. Room service was what she heard as she strolled to the door. A peep out before opening the door. She was still a cautious person. She opened the door and allowed the man to bring the cart in. She had forgotten to get a tip out. Sorry, just a moment. He nodded as he waited.

The tip taken care of; the guy left as quickly as he had come. She sat with the food, still in another place. It was as if the dream was attempting to invade her space at the moment. Lila had the dream intact when she woke two days ago. The pieces seem to have evaporated, and she couldn’t understand why she was there.

Lila ate without tasting her dinner. The golden man and his friend invaded her thoughts. Had his friend followed her? She had barely noticed the friend the night before. All of her attention had been on the golden man. She laughed. Calling him the golden man sounds like a Bond movie.

There was a draw to walk on the beach again tonight. But it was later than last night, and she was entirely out of her element so the walk could wait for tomorrow.

Tomorrow…

© 2019, Ivy Jade

Paul knocked on Jacob’s door. “Coming,” Jacob yelled.

“What are you doing up so early?” Jacob asked. “I could ask you the same thing.” Paul replied.

Jacob paused and stared at his friend. “Well, Paul if you must know I could not sleep last night, so I got up and fixed breakfast and went through some boxes that have been sitting for years.”

“Any reason for that?” Jacob heard the unspoken question. He debated with himself. Should I say I am looking for the woman we saw on the beach last night?

The silence went on. “I’m sure at some point you will tell what is so important in boxes stacked in a corner for years.”

“Paul don’t push this morning, I’m sleep deprived.” “You will never guess who I ran into this morning.” “This is a big city and you know plenty people and it could be anyone. So no I can’t guess.”

“I stopped in the cafe at the Beach Plaza Hotel this morning. Actually, I was walking by and saw the woman from last night.”

“What woman from last night?” “Jacob, really you want to be like that? I saw you watching that woman until she was out of sight.”

“Paul, I watch a lot of women. Not like you don’t.”

“What is with you this morning?” Jacob shrugged, “Not sure what you mean.” 

“We have been friends since kindergarten and now you want to play crazy with me. I’m the man who told you not to marry Shawn, but you did anyway. Look how that turned out.”

“Thanks for that reminder to add to my exhausted morning. Why did you fill the need to tell me you saw that woman?”

“I spoke with her for a moment and she was snippy with me. Didn’t like me interrupting her breakfast.” Jacob laughed, “Don’t say I blame her for that.”

“Anyway, after I left the cafe, I kept thinking there was more to the two of you and I wanted to know what it was or is.” “Paul, there isn’t anything to know, I saw a woman and watched her, end of story.”

“You were in a daze and did not hear a word I said last night when you were gazing at her. Last night you denied you are staring at that woman.

“You had a look in your eyes.” Paul raised his hand to stop Jacob from speaking. “I don’t have a prejudice bone in my body. I never saw myself being with a black woman. Since you are my best friend I have trouble seeing you interested in the black woman.”

“Paul, I look at women, period. It does not matter their color, shape or size.”

“Would you be with a black woman?” “Yes, if I liked her.” “Wow, I thought I knew you.” “I guess I could say the same about you. Paul, why does this woman upset you?”

“I’m not upset, well maybe a little. A few blocks from here I bumped into another black woman. Literally bumped into her. I muttered sorry, but she gave me a side eye. It wasn’t like I intended to bump into her. This morning feels like too many black women around here.”

“Do you hear yourself? There have always been plenty black women in Miami. You must not have notice them.”

“I still want to know why you are going through the boxes and who that woman is to you?”

“I might be sleep deprived but I think you must have bumped your head. These are boxes I have put off going through for years and decided today was the day.”

“If you say so.”

“Let it go, okay.” Hopefully, I will do the same.

© 2019, Ivy Jade

Lila jumped out of bed. She sang in the shower. Albeit not a word was in tune, but she continued to sing as she moved back to the room to get dressed. These were songs of her youth. Some which she had not heard or song in thirty or forty years.

She was on a memory lane trip. Then Lila thought of the man on the beach. The man with the golden tan. Why is he so familiar? It was on the tip of her tongue.

She paused before heading to the cafe in the hotel. She had no plans for the rest of the day. But she knew she needed fuel, and it always started with breakfast.

She bounced into the cafe and waved at the waitress. Karen chuckled as she watched Lila come in. Lila found the perfect seat, she could observe others as they came and went. It was her photographer eye that was always watching others. Never wanting to miss anything. That was a holdover from being a kid. She always wanted to be in the know. That was probably why it was bothering why she couldn’t get over the feeling she knew the man on the patio.

“Well, someone must have had a great night,” Karen said as she placed the menu in front of Lila.

“Why would you say that?” Lila asked.

“Yesterday, you looked like you did not want to be here and today you walked tall like the queen of the world.”

Lila laughed. “I guess I decided to be happy about this trip. Not sure why I came back, might as well be happy.”

“if you say so. Same as yesterday?”

“Yes, cereal, hot tea and lots of fresh fruit.”

Lila watched Karen walk to place her order. She was glad to be back in South Florida, more for the fruit than for anything else. She had little family still living, and most of her friends had moved away. So why am I here? She had gotten on a plane and come here after a strange dream.

A man walked in. The way he searched the cafe made Lila take notice. He took his time walking between the tables, then sat at the last one. The man made sure his back was not to the open door. This is Miami, there are always bizarre things going on. Something about the man brought the TV series, Miami Vice to mind. Lila had not been living in Miami when it filmed here, but she often watched, just to see the Miami sights.

As quickly as he sat, the man got up and moved to another table. She got a newspaper from the rack by the door. There were only four others in the cafe, so not much to watch. Going back to her table she saw the man watching her. A brief second he looked familiar. Shaking her head as if to knock the image in place, she sat. I must be seeing things. That’s two days in a row I’ve seen a man, and he looked familiar.

Within seconds of getting the newspaper, Karen placed her breakfast on the table. Lila looked up and found the man’s eyes on her. She had promised herself she would not go postal on anyone. But she wanted to ask why was he staring.

Without looking up, Lila felt his presence. “Do you have a problem with me?” She asked. He smirked. “No, not really. I saw you on the beach last night. Just wondered who you are.”

“Why would you…” He interrupted Lila, “My friend seemed taken with you, that’s all.”

“Ah, you were on the patio last night.” It was a statement, not a question to him. “Yes, I was. Are you from here?” “I used to live here another lifetime ago. Now I would love to eat my breakfast if there are no other questions.” He laughed and walked out of the cafe.

Well, that was strange. Who is the man and who is his friend?

After breakfast, Lila walked the strip. Down from the cafe, there was a bakery having a class on baking fancy cookies. And just like that, her morning had a plan. After several hours of baking and eating cookies, Lila returned to the hotel to get her rental car.

She drove to the Liberty City area. It was one of the many areas in Miami; she had lived as a kid. Now looking back it was if they were nomads. She knew it had more to do with her parents losing jobs, which lead to losing their apartments.

She passed the last house she had lived in. There were clothes on the line. She didn’t know people still dried their clothes outside on the line. A throwback to a time long gone.

Lila drove past her old high school, the man from the night before came to mind. She could see him younger with his golden skin as if he had lived in the sun. She knew he hadn’t gone to high school with her because in those days they segregated the schools.

Why did I think of him when I passed the school? What is the connection?

© 2019 Ivy Jade

The next morning Jacob got up after a restless night. Dreams kept him up. Now the images were flitting away like the butterflies outside his window. He attempted to dig deep into his psyche hoping to gather the threads of the dreams that were just at the edge of his brain.

She was in those dreams, he was sure of that. Why did she seem so familiar, yet he could not place where he could possibly know her. Dragging himself from the bed, Jacob headed to the bathroom. Once in the shower, the image of the woman walking with books appeared. Did she go to school with him and he never noticed her?

Coffee and toast were his breakfast after a quick shower. This was going to bug him all day. As soon as he was finished eating, Jacob placed his coffee cup and plate in the dishwasher. So conditioned after all these years, to never leave anything out. Sometimes he wanted to leave a dish out just for the hell of it. There was no one here to harp on it and make him feel like a slob.

Where is the box with all of the yearbooks? He had packed them away many years ago. His ex, Minnie, didn’t like seeing pictures him with old girlfriends. He couldn’t make her understand they were ‘old’ girlfriends and he was married to her. He finally understood her insecurity. That had been a big part of their life together.

The third bedroom was more of a junk room than an office and definitely not a guest room. Boxes that hadn’t been opened in years stacked along the wall by the closet. Well, today was as good as any to start going through them. Especially since he didn’t know which box contained his old yearbooks.

Twenty boxes, he didn’t remember it had been that many boxes. Well, he hadn’t really checked in this room in years. Might as well start with the one on the top and work his way down was his thoughts. There were tax returns from more than twenty years ago. Oh, those can go in the pile to be shredded. One box down and too many more to go.

He found toys in the next box. His son and daughter were in their thirty’s, and neither of them had kids, and it didn’t look like they ever would. He had never considered if he wanted grandchildren. There wasn’t a legacy of himself to leave behind. The toys were placed back in the box with a post-it that said, Goodwill.

Ten boxes off the wall and down around him and he sat on the floor. Jacob still hadn’t found the yearbooks. Would be just my luck they would be in the last box. Or maybe just maybe Minnie had thrown them away for spite. The thought of that had the old feelings of anger and rage to rear its head. She was a lot of things but was she that spiteful. The answer was yes, and he knew.

Next, to the last box, he found photo albums. These were the chronicles of their life together. There were photos with faces cut out. He could only shake his head. There was nothing he could do with them at this point. Fragments of a life that was long ago. Maybe one day his kids would want some of these photos.

Finally, the last box and there weren’t any yearbooks. As far as Jacob knew these were the only boxes in the house. When he moved to the beach house, he had taken all of the boxes out of the old house before he put it on the market. That had been seven years ago. Perhaps one of his kids had taken a box when they were going through what they wanted.

A glance into the closet and there was one more box. Aha, there were all of Jacob’s yearbooks. The years of high school and college. He stacked them in his arms and headed out to the patio. It had begun to get dark. He had been in there all day looking for these yearbooks. He placed them on the table and headed back in for something to eat. Now that he had found them, Jacob would spend time going through hoping he would find a photo of the mystery woman he had seen on the beach.

© 2019 Ivy Jade

Growing up in Miami, Lila Richards had never come over to Miami Beach. So why did she feel drawn to this area? This entire trip home was beginning to feel like the twilight zone. In the midst of opening her gallery, there was this call to come home. Actually, it was more like a wake-up call.

Now this walk along the beach felt like she had been here before. She felt a presence before she saw the man. On the patio, a pair of eyes seem to follow her every step. The closer she got to the beach house, she faltered. Why does he look familiar? She had never been on this beach before, and she hadn’t lived in Miami in over 40 years.

She looked up and smiled as she continued to walk past the patio. She didn’t bother to look again, so she didn’t know if the man smiled or just continued to stare. Did he not see black people on this stretch of the beach? She looked down at her clothing. There was nothing out of the ordinary. Her t-shirt and her shorts were not too tight. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail, and her sandals were new. She had had a pedicure the day before, so she knew her toes looked great.

The further she walked down the beach, the less the intense feeling she had encountered earlier. Still deep was the feeling of being watched. Tired of walking, she sat in the sand and took out her tablet. She had come prepared to spend some time close to the water. Even though she had never learned to swim, there was always a draw to be near the water.

She read until she felt her eyes closing. Maybe it was time to head back to the hotel. She didn’t understand why she had been drawn back to her hometown after these years and to this beach today. She had been in the sun too long, and even though her medium brown skin glistened, she could feel the burn. She always forgot to put sunscreen on, since she never stayed out in the sun long.

She packed the towel she had sitting on, along with her tablet back into the small backpack. One more swig of the water from her water bottle, then time to start the walk past that patio.

The closer she got to the beach house, the more intense the feeling of being watched as well as a buzz in her body. She didn’t believe in the old superstitions her family had talked about years ago. But there was definitely something strange happening. Half the distance to the beach house, she saw him come out on the patio. He was now alone. The other man was nowhere in sight.

Lila couldn’t make out what was in his hands until she got close. He stood with a sandwich and a bottle of beer. The least she could do was smile and wave as she passed.

Once again she didn’t think he had smiled back. With his hands full, he didn’t wave back. He just stared. She could tell he was still watching as she continued back to the hotel.

The hotel was a welcome sight. Lila felt the uneasy feeling leave her body the closer she got to the hotel. In the elevator, she shook her body as if shaking the uneasiness away. In her room, she dropped the backpack and headed to the shower. Hoping the water would not only wash the sand away but also the weird feelings that wouldn’t go away. Why was she here?

© 2019 Ivy Jade

“Jacob, where did you just go?”

“Nowhere, I’m still here.”

“Man, I asked you a question minutes ago, and you haven’t flinched. So…where was your mind?” Paul asked.

Not wanting to admit he was thinking about a woman that might just be his imagination, Jacob hesitated in answering. Paul had known him too many years so he would have to come up with something Paul would accept and not push any further.

“I have to decide if it is time to move from here.”

“This has always been home and you more than anyone I know always never wanted to live anywhere else.”

“I know, but there’s an itch to see someplace else.”

“Jacob, I don’t buy that for a moment. The look on your face was not about moving. It was about a person. What gives?”

“Do you believe in ghost?”

“Did you see someone you thought was dead?”

“Something like that. Maybe home is not what it was anymore.”

Paul began to walk away. A quick look over his shoulder at his friend. “No I don’t believe in ghost, and neither do you.” He left Jacob was still holding a bottle of beer that he had never opened.

Long after Paul had left Jacob sat, staring in the direction he had seen her. He didn’t know her name, but everything about her seemed so familiar. He had never dated black girls, and once he was grown, he had been married to the same woman for forty years until she died. So why was this woman taking up so much of his time? Well not his time but occupying space in his mind.

Jacob continued to rack his brain for some piece that spoke to him about her. She walked past, gave him a smile and kept walking. It wasn’t as if she had spoken. So he didn’t know the sound of her voice. Maybe that would have helped him place her.

As he sat, he started down the memory lane of his life. No, he knew she didn’t go to school with him. His elementary, junior high and senior high schools were all-white. Then he had to think about college. As far as he could remember there weren’t any black students at his college. If there were he would have remembered them. He was the big man on campus in those days. He knew everyone or at least everyone knew him.

Then he thought of his work life. Maybe he had seen her in court. There were too many cases in forty years, but something about her said he should remember her. She was unforgettable. Was it her smile, or her walk he asked himself.

His stomach growled. The sound was the reminder he had been sitting for hours and had not eaten. The beer still unopened sat on the table. His body creaked as he stretched and rose from the chair. He had been sitting in one spot too long. That was the horror of getting old. There had been a time he could bounce out of the chair and not feel the aches and pains of his body.

The house was quiet. This was the new norm. No one to nag if he left the door open. Yes, there would be flies inside or maybe a mosquito or two. The kitchen was still a mess from his attempt at breakfast many hours ago. “Yuck, something smells awful in here.” He began to clean the kitchen even as his stomach grumbled and growled.

After washing the dishes and throwing away the food that had been sitting on the counter all day, he made a sandwich. Then he remembers the bottle of beer still on the patio. With his sandwich, he headed back to the patio. A buzz climbed up his spine. It was the same feeling he had had earlier in the day. Then he saw her walking up the beach once again. She smiled and kept walking. Once again she didn’t speak. He watched until he could no longer see her.

Who is she and why does she seem familiar?

© 2019 Ivy Jade